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Like which groomsman will get the drunkest, whether or not the DJ will play “Single Ladies," or if the bride will cry during the speeches. It lets your potential hookup know that you're available (Why the hell else would you be dancing with Memaw?

(Besides, you owe it to your friend to go — he's only going to get married once-ish in his life.) During the post-ceremony mingling, to be standing next to the woman you want to hook up with and say something like, "You definitely were the best stander of all the bridesmaids." Introduce yourself, chat — she's going to be busy, so be brief — and manage to make a bet with her.

The only obstacle between you and spending your buddy's wedding night with a bridesmaid — or any other single woman at the wedding, really — should be her Spanx.

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